Now that the AARP magazine is arriving in the mail with its upbeat stories about fulfillment and mindfulness (along with ads for anti-depressants), I’ve created my personal plan to appear hip.
#1. Keys are to be placed in my pocket and not my handbag. I become my mother when I say “I can’t find my keys.”
#2. I must never discuss the different types of fiber powder.
#3. I must try to use both hands to text.
#4. I must never ask the waiter if he’s sure it’s decaf.